Almost everybody in Italia is a foreigner to me. Sometimes it’s difficult to get by without seeking kindness in strangers first.
“Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly and most underrated agent of human change.”
Bob Kerry
Last month I finally went and applied for my Italian passport. Even though my citizenship was complete in July, I procrastinated on this last step. I knew I would have to present myself to some formidable, intimidating police officer at the Polizia di Stato (State Police of Italia). I was anxious. As with most fears, if they run their course, they conjure up a frightening version far from the truth. My dread centered on the language barrier that would be part of the process and the official nature of my visit. The longer I put off the inevitable, the further my fear took me from reality.
I triple checked my passport application days in advance, and then I checked it again the night before my appointment and one final time the morning I left. I spell-checked, google translator-checked, box-checked, picture-checked, even ink-checked the color of my signature. This moment I had imagined for years was finally happening.
My formidable police officer vision quickly vanished when I arrived and the guy at the counter greeted me. He looked frazzled and tired, but he had a kind look in his eyes. He saw my toothy American smile coming from a distance. I approached the window and uttered my magic words of language self-submission, “Mi dispiace. Sto imparando l’italiano, ma non capisco bene. Può parlare lentamente per favore? – I’m sorry. I’m learning Italian, but I don’t understand well. Can you speak slowly please?”
These words are my calling card to conversations. It’s like throwing a white surrender flag up in the face of any stranger. It says, “I come in peace and my only desire is to understand you.” It gives them pause and usually elicits a smile, or a “No, Lei parla bene, bravo!” Then it is simply two human beings attempting to communicate to understand each other’s needs. It always brings out kindness in strangers.
The overall process was easier than my fear would have led me to believe, and there was a part of me that was proud to have succeeded in this most transaction. Just this week I received an email:
Subject Line: Il tuo passoporto è disponibile. My passport was ready.
When I arrived to pick up my passport the kind gentleman wasn’t there. But I marched straight to the woman at the desk and confidently said, “Il mio passoporto è disponibile.” I handed her my identification card and dropped my calling card phrase. She smiled and asked me to wait at the counter, “Aspetta qui.” She returned a minute later with that beautiful burgundy-colored book of international identity. When she put it in my hands, I felt a small tremble course through me.
I left the Polizia di Stato with damp eyes, but not from the rain that poured down in Torino that day, but from the significance of the moment and the journey to get there. I decided to celebrate that moment and immediately thought a special lunch was in order.
As I bicycled over to my favorite lunch spot, I was hit with a memory that I had tucked away a long time ago. That memory involved the unexpected kindness of a stranger I met during a routine work day. I have to credit that person for igniting the spark that ultimately led me to that afternoon in Torino, bicycling with my new passport in my pocket.
In my early 20s I worked as a tour guide on Santa Catalina Island off the coast of Southern California. It was and still is a local destination for people who want to escape the hustle and bustle of Los Angeles for a day or two. I travelled there by boat everyday along with hundreds of tourists.
One day on the boat, another tour guide sat next to me. I didn’t know her well but had seen her several times. She introduced herself as Katia, and we started a pleasant conversation. I heard her faint German accent and was interested in her origin. She revealed she was born in Liechtenstein, a tiny principality in Europe tucked between Austria and Switzerland: Google Maps. She left her home many years ago, but longed to go back. As she talked, she reached into her purse and pulled out two passports, one for Liechtenstein and the other for the US.
I remember being transfixed on those passports and the idea that one could plant their feet on two continents. In that moment was where my dual-citizenship idea was first sparked, 28 or so years ago.
Fast-forward to this week, as I enjoyed my lunch of pizza, fiori di zucca (stuffed zucchini blossoms), and a glass of Nebbiolo d’Alba. I took a moment to toast my accomplishment, the kind people at the Polizia di Stato, and Katia who helped start all of this. I have no idea what happened to her, but hopefully she found her way back home. Maybe by writing this post there will be a spark of positive energy she’ll feel wherever she is. Thank you for inspiring me, Katia.
Forever grateful for the kindness in all strangers, with love, Luke
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Congrats! Your stories always make me smile. it’s been a long time coming and you did it! So happy for you! Love you!
I’m pleasent with your choices! Claudia
Grazie mille, Claudia. Spero che tutto va bene per Lei e la tua famiglia. Saluta tua figlia per me!
Congratulations!!!! That is wonderful 🤗
Thank you! Definitely a full-circle brilliant sunshine moment!! 🙂
Your writings are heartfelt, compassionate and well written…..very enjoyable. It’s nice to read without feeling the writer has an agenda, too. Stay inspired by the simple things, maybe the only place to find real truths. From a Caribbean Island, Roatan, Holly🦋
Holly, thank you for finding me all the way from Roatan. If I weren’t in Italy, I would be somewhere in your neighborhood. I have a love affair with all things Caribbean. 😄🏖
Thank you for your encouragement! I must admit, I have a tiny agenda. I hope that someone who is facing a life disruption, loss or upheaval, finds my writing and perhaps it gives them another perspective that they are not alone and it’s ok to start again. 👌👌
Thank you again and enjoy that beautiful sunshine in Roatan! ☀️
Yay! Congratulations on achieving another milestone in your life journey.
Thank you! One more down…and many more to go. 🙏🤗
Bravissimo! Happy for you! Probably a relief that an end has come to all the red tape italiano! Who knows, maybe one day I will also apply for Italian citizenship and when that time has come, I will surely remember your story. Enjoy your burgundy gem …
Claire, thank you! It is a relief and rewarding! I’m glad you enjoyed the post and good luck if you choose to go through the process. My burgundy gem is tucked in a safe place for visitation only. 😀
Congratulations! I love reading and following your path. You are such an inspiration. 😘
Thank you Sandi! I am so happy to hear that..just when I need some gas in the tank, your comment lifted my spirits! Hugs to you..and wishing you nothing but sunshine! XOXO
Lucca,
You did it my friend! You journey continues and you just keep ticking things off your “list” big, small, scary and fun! I bet there are a few strangers that talk about how you touched their lives too. What am I saying — there are more than a few!!!
Say hi to Tracy when she arrives this week.
Love u man!! Lisa❤️👏😌
LISAAAA!! Thank you my friend! Your words mean everything. You are always brilliant sunshine to me on a cloudy day!! I love you too and I will definitely give Tracy a “hello” from ya! XOXO
Complimenti Luca !!! ce l’hai fatta!!! Hai seguito un sogno quando così poche persone lo fanno mai!
Happy for you and proud of you!!
Grazie! Vedo un percorso simile per te … e sì, dobbiamo pianificare il tuo rientro in Italia. Grazie sempre per il tuo supporto. XOXO
Congratulations! I love this story, Luke!
Thank you, Carolyn. I love that you love it! Baci & abbracci da Italia.
Congratulations!!! A great day and you got
Your zucchini blossoms…if they really even exist.
Thank you! Those damn zucchini blossoms are in such high demand at the end of the season, they sell out fast 🙂 I’m sorry we didn’t have them when you were here..but when you get back..it’s a must do!
You have come so far Luke! Huge congratulations on this milestone. Your best life is yet to come. Enjoy!!!!
Thank you Julie. I believe that it will get even more amazing. Sending hugs to you and Kent!
So proud of you and your accomplishments to achieve your dreams. You are an inspiration.
Thank you Linda! And thank you for inspiring me through some tough stuff as well!
Congrats on all going well!
Thank you Paul!! It definitely has it ups/downs..but it’s moving forward. That’s all I can ask for now.
Congratulations on getting your Italian passport! I remember when I went into the consulate to pick my passport up. It was such a sense of accomplishment and pride. The only thing that was difficult for me was going home and knowing that I couldn’t show my dad – the person who made it all possible, who gave me this incredible oppourtunity to call two countries home!
Thank you! I know your father was smiling at your perseverance, strength and willingness to take the leap in his honor. I hope our paths cross in person and we can toast those who made this possible for both of us. Sending hugs from Piemonte!
bravo ! I know that feeling, getting my citizenship and passport were emotional for me. all the childhood stories from my mother and father were but imagined , but going there , seeing it’s reality, meeting family who embraced me , staying in my mother’s home and finally holding the documents …..This is who I am , this is where I come from
this is my home and my people too. It was the full circle of my life . qualche volte si e una vita bella ……gina
Thank you Gina! What a pleasure to see your comment. Isn’t it amazing how we dream about this as a child…and then we find ourselves here in that moment..thinking all of those feelings of belonging that we grew up with in our families. È vero, spesso volte si e una vita Bella! Grazie mille per il tuo commento! – Luke