An Unforgettable Summer: Dog Bites, Family Sights, and Sizzling Nights

When I take a break from writing in the summer, it usually means one of three things: I’m traveling and collecting stories, I’m lazily doing nothing on the beach, or I’m blocked and have nothing to write about. Well, this month I have a lot to update you on. Between an unexpected trip to the emergency room and the Tuscan family reunion I’d been planning for months, the summer has been full of unforgettable events. The stories are laughable, memorable, and just a wee bit anxiety-inducing.

When the Dog Bites

I have an adorably cute dog who is half koala bear, part Ewok from Star Wars, and occasionally mistaken for a furry bunny. Sofia is the perfect gay man’s dog if you’re single and looking to attract attention from passersby.

I admit I’ve been pimping her out as a social magnet for most of her life. She doesn’t seem to mind. There are worse things she could be doing on the Italian Riviera.

When a tourist or local stops me on the street because they want to pet Sofia or get her attention, it’s fine. It happens constantly. Typically, Sofia is patient and gives them what they want before becoming completely indifferent to their attention a few seconds later.

I, the patient dog dad, have to sit through long conversations with strangers about their dogs. If it’s not the dog they left behind on vacation, it’s the one they just put down. Alternatively, it’s the one they had growing up. They scroll through photos, while I wear my most convincing expression of interest.

When somebody says, “Let me show you mine,” or Ti faccio vedere il mio, sometimes I want to reply, “Please don’t. I’m not really interested.” Then I remember they’re talking about their dog, and it’s important to them.

Am I terrible for thinking that? It’s not that I don’t like dogs; it just takes a lot to get my attention. Dogs need to be “Sofia-grade” cute to capture my interest.

Well, after years of this general lack of enthusiasm, karma came back to bite me in the ass. Literally.

Four days before my brother and his wife arrived for the start of our Tuscan family reunion, I found myself in the emergency room — the pronto soccorso, as it’s called in Italy. There I was, flat on my belly with my pants around my ankles while two doctors examined my backside. The culprit? An aggressive dog that launched itself at me and bit me in the ass. Twice.

Specifically, I was at the dog park earlier that morning with Sofia when a dog came up behind me and decided, for no apparent reason, I looked like the perfect chew toy.

Needless to say, when it happened, I yelled, in perfectly understandable English, “What the fuck?” garnering everyone’s attention at the dog park. That’s when the dog circled back…and bit me in the ass again.

The owner was shocked and dismayed, “Lui è bravo. Non fa niente,” she insisted.

“He’s a good dog. He doesn’t do anything.”

My response was equally clear.

“Signora, non è bravo. Mi ha morso due volte sul culo.”

Which literally means, “Ma’am, he’s not a good dog. He bit me on the ass twice.”

At the time, my only reaction was to grab Sofia and get away from that aggressive bastard. The owner immediately tried to restrain her dog and, as she did, said, “Me ne vado.”

“I’m leaving.”

In that moment, I think she was every bit as shocked and frightened as I was. However, it never occurred to me to ask for her contact information.

There I was in the emergency room with my ass exposed to everyone. Despite my embarrassment, I was trying to explain to the doctor in Italian that I had no information about either the dog’s owner or the dog itself. I worried about rabies. The doctors worried about tetanus.

In the end, they sent me home with some iodine, bandages, and instructions to watch for signs of infection. They told me not to worry. Apparently, rabies isn’t really a thing anymore in Europe when it comes to domestic dogs.

At least, I hoped not.

A Tuscan Family Reunion to Remember

In the aftermath of the dog-bite-to-the-ass drama, my family began arriving a few days later for a full-scale family reunion in the heart of Tuscany. Thankfully, the excitement of that was a much-needed diversion for my attention.

I had always known that one day there would be a time to bring all of my family together in Italy, but I knew it had to be the right time. When my father fell ill early last year, it seemed to be the wake-up call I needed to start planning our first Tuscan family reunion, before our lives became further dispersed.

I floated the idea to my family during a group call in May. Everyone had a chance to vote on where we should meet. Tuscany won by a landslide. After some searching, I found the perfect place for a Tuscan family reunion in the heart of Chianti, Borgo San Vincenti. It was a beautifully restored medieval village with enough space and activities for all 19 of us.

The day our Tuscan family reunion officially kicked off, I had arranged two Pullman vans to bring most of the group from Rome to Borgo San Vincenti. The looks on my family’s faces as they stepped out of the vans said everything. Yes, they were travel-weary, but so happy to see each other again. It was something I’ll never forget. There were few dry eyes as my entire family embraced on a hilltop in Tuscany. For months, this trip had existed only in texts, emails, and family phone calls. Suddenly, everyone was there.

That evening, our hosts prepared a magnificent dinner for our Tuscan family reunion. The wine flowed, the food kept coming, and for the first time in a very long time, my entire family was together around one table, laughing, sharing stories, and simply enjoying being together.

Over the course of the week, we struck a nice balance between spending time together and giving everyone the freedom to explore Italy on their own. Some ventured to Venice, others to Rome, and I even had the pleasure of leading a small group through the streets of Florence.

The children experienced a little culture shock, but they ended up being the most adaptable members of the group. It was us adults who found ourselves juggling flights, coaches, rental cars, and meal planning.

Ultimately, I feel incredibly fortunate that our Tuscan family reunion brought everyone to my corner of the world. Giving the youngest members of the family their first taste of Europe was something I’ll never forget. More than anything, I hope this trip lit a little fire in some of them. The world is a big, beautiful, complicated place, and there’s no better classroom. If I nudged even one of them toward exploring it, I’ll take that as a victory.

Finally, here are some photos from our journey that make me smile.

Welcome home and the start of summer on the Riviera

We finished our trip the first week of July, and I returned home on the 5th to my regular life. It took a few days to come down from the emotions of the time we spent together, but the memories will last forever. It was wonderful to share a part of my world with them, and for the first time in many years, see all of us together celebrating all of life’s twists, turns, and detours.

At home, summer is in full swing, and in just a few days Sanremo will be inundated with vacationing Italians and visitors who descend on the Riviera for the month of August. The town will more than double in population as we approach the 15th and the Italian holiday known as Ferragosto. Restaurants, bars, and temperatures will be sizzling, and moving around the city will be almost impossible by car.

It’s my favorite time of year. Sanremo once again becomes the center of attention for Italians, along with visitors from France, England, Germany, Denmark, and the rest of Europe. For the next several weeks, the city will buzz with life from morning until well after midnight, and I intend to enjoy every minute of it.

I hope you have a wonderful summer, filled with intentional joy and less unintended chaos. Maybe a Tuscan family reunion isn’t in your future, but if you happen to encounter any strange dogs along the way, I hope your experience is a little less of a pain in the ass than mine was.

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